Animal Crackers

04/15/2020- Transcript. Dr. Fritz analyzing Patient 0 Name-UNK – Age 8, Gender: Male, Place of Birth: sector 5, orphan exhibiting mild amnesia, pale skin, loss of hair, possible ASPD. Referred by, INT. core. Results needed immediately. Please sign, hard copy only.

“Hi, please have a seat. Do you want some animal crackers?”


“Here you go.”

“Do you like animals?”

“I like four animals.” 

“What animals do you like?”

“I like tigers, I like hippos, I like giraffes, and I like zebras.”   

“That is really specific.”


“Tell me why you like each one.”

“Okay. I like tigers because they are the top predators of the jungle. A tiger will stalk you hidden and silent among the vines and when you least expect it, it will crush your neck and eat you while your heart is still warm.”

“I see.”

“I like hippos because they can beat up crocodiles. Pit a crocodile against a hippo and you would think a crocodile would win and have a full meal but you’re wrong. That water is hippo’s turf and the hippo would trash the crocodile to death”

“Go on.”

“I like giraffes because they challenge each other and fight with their long necks. It looks silly and I could laugh endlessly but that is the way life is. ”

“And Zebras?”

“I like Zebras because they confuse lions with their patterns. Lions get frustrated when they can’t see a single one. The best part though is when lions do single a zebra out, I love the sight of black, white, and red – my favorite colors.”

…cont. on next page.


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