Fourth Wall

“Okay, here’s an idea. Write the classic Romeo and Juliet story. I know what you’re thinking but hold on listen to this. So there’s this random guy we can name Rando for now. And there’s the usual family feud between Romeo’s family and Juliet’s but instead of these two falling for each other, they each fall for Rando. Don’t worry the ending won’t end in a huge threesome and all of them killing themselves or anything like that. The conflict will be different. Rando is just some random guy that loves to do work for both families right but Juliet finds out that Romeo is into Rando and Romeo finds out that Juliet is into Rando and they each make it their objective to seduce him asking the families for help and favors. They both end up sleeping with Rando, only to find out that Rando is the step-brother for both, by an affair of Romeo’s dad and Juliet’s mom. So then yeah they drink poison and kill themselves unable to live with the shame of incest, but Rando just goes on to the tell the story the classical way.”

“That has to be the stupidest thing I have ever heard. And it did end with them killing themselves.”

“Okay fine, here’s another idea. There’s a man. He has the perfect body. I’m talking ripped abs, bulging muscles, worked out on leg day and all of that. But, he doesn’t have nipples. And he wants to compete professionally but everyone is always thrown off by him not having nipples. So at first he tries to argue that men don’t need nipples anyway but nobody buys it. So he draws nipples on himself, and that fails along with tattooing them and using fake nipples and the story goes on with him trying to solve the nipple problem. So he-“

“No, that’s enough. What else?”

“Okay, here’s another one. So there’s a guy that likes to read books. But he doesn’t read them in the conventional sense, he likes to read them backwards and he gains understanding from them that way like no one has ever before. One day, he decides to read the Bible in his delicate way and he finds out that-“

“No, no, no, don’t bring in religion here. Let’s keep it original but let’s not offend anyone.”

“Fine. He finds out that if you read the Bible the right way it makes more sense. Okay, let me throw this final idea to you and I’ll come back tomorrow. So there’s this guy who is writing a character that is giving ideas to another character. This character breaks the fourth wall and realizes that he isn’t really alive and so he starts freaking out and the other character just disappears out of nowhere and the story ends in a cliche.”

The End.

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